Is There Anybody Out There?

Dearest daughter,

Sometimes in life, we question whether we are the only one experiencing great loss or pain…almost as if nobody could understand what we are going through.  The day I had to give away my very first horse who I waited 30 years for was one of those days.  My horse and I were a perfect pair and if it wasn’t for the financial and emotional situation I was in, I would have never let him go.  But I had to.  And I endured pain that seemed to last forever.

I remember asking is there anybody out there who could understand the loss I was feeling.  Yes, he was just a horse…not a person.  But he was my best friend and I had never been able to have a horse of my own before so I gave my heart freely to him.  We bonded and experienced great adventures together. I dreamed big about what we would do in the future and where we would go on the show circuit.  Then a divorce and financial battle of my life ensued and the rest is all written history that I choose to not look back on unless I am forced to.

Today I am feeling emotions similar to those days…like I am the only one out there feeling the pain and frustration I feel.  It is for other reasons but it is pain nonetheless.

My best advice to you is when those days come and they will….try to not allow yourself to get wrapped up in them.  Try to focus on the good and the beautiful.  Try to not give in to the insecurities inside.  Instead, try to have faith that this is only a moment and this moment will pass.

It is always nice to know that there are others out there who care.  I often wonder if anyone does care other than those who know me and love me.  Does anyone else out there even care about my story?  Is my story, my life making any difference in anyone else’s life?  Not sure.  I guess time will tell.

Love,

Mom